Can I ask you...when did this start for you? When did you first notice things were wrong and when did he first express doubts about your R?
Thanks Ali for your advice. You are right I need to allow things to happen naturally and it might take a couple of months for me to be in a position to decide what needs to happen next.
December 2000 - We get married. We had dated for 3 years, and been close friends since I was 14. Happily in love, world is rosy. September 04 - We are travelling around the world together. We end up living in Canada for a year at a ski resort, where the lifestyle is to party hard. I am homesick. Girls are fawning over H. I am secure that H loves me..... although I sense that something is not right and that he might be attracted to another girl. We discuss, H convinces me that I'm crazy. H supposedly has a one night stand with this girl. R from this point is OK - not brilliant but not awful. We go through really stressful times of moving countries, H starting his own business, my career changing, trying to make new friends. October/November 06 - H drops bomb that he cheated on me (I think hoping that I'm going to leave him as he obviously wants out of R). H is really angry and probably depressed. Year of hell as I try to sort my own feelings of betrayal while desperately clinging and trying to hold the marriage together. We go to a few counselling sessions. H says all the 'right' things, but acts the opposite way. I find flirtatious emails to another girl. I do all the classic things that actually push H further away - lots of trying to 'fix' him. H see-saws back and forth. H answers every question (literally every question, not just R questions) with "I dont know". September 07 - I put pressure on H to make a decision.... H leaves. October-November 07 - I find DB-ing and the rest you know because you have walked this journey with me!
