What a freaking day. I have felt so ate up today with pain and anger. The pain has been really intense off and on all day. I had drill weekend this weekend so I was out of town. I did talk with a priest for awhile. He was somewhat helpful, but I was able to let some things out.
When I was driving back here if I saw a car that looked like my W or OM I was struck even harder by the pain and anger of it all. The anger started to border on hatred. I can usually control my emotions well, but this time the anger, pain and hatred was burning really deep. I am smart enough to understand some things that are driving it, but I still can't stop the anger from rising up.
My W in her wisdom did not pay the cell or house phone bills. So both are shut off right now. I can't talk to D11 at the moment and that pisses me off. I would go out there to see her but if OM is around I would not have a job Monday. If I could without consequence I would knock the h@ll out of that sob. What a f-ing friend he turned out to be.
I do know, control the anger ect. It will pass, so I would rather vent here then go over there and do something dumb. Right now I want to just stay angry.
