I wanted to add a litte bit myself. I actually DO belong to two sites that many would consider "let go and let God" approaches. However, although these are Bible based Christian sites, the participants do NOT sit back and do NOTHING.
Quite contrary. We are also advised to seek our hearts and soul to see where we have offended our spouses and NOT heeded to Biblical principles. These are things we are called to repent for and one of the sites even advices we apologize to our spouses for our part in the marriage but only ONCE. After that we leave them alone and let God do what he needs to do. During that time we are encouraged to pray for them and WAIT for GOD to lead our spouses to contact us. There are sites that suggest us writing a card here and there. But even then the basic overall view is that we give our spouses space while we WORK ON OUSELVES. But that does not mean STAND STILL and do nothing.
That means take an active role asking God to assist us in changing us into the pepople he sees us as. Some of us need help zippping the lips, maybe cleaning the home, caring for the kids, disciplining the children, finances, the list can be long or short depending on the person. While we are looking to God for direction and transformation of ourselves God is working on our spopuses. We are EXPECTED to TRUST Him fully. God is the God of impossible. There is no situation He can not heal or restore, but WE have to have FAITH in HIM as the God of impossiblilites. If we place limits on God and Jesus how ca they effectively help heal our families?
Does any of this sound familiar? You see the DB priniciples fit very well along with Biblical principles. I have read both DR and DB myself. Someone here recognized something in my post regarding faith and directed me to the more Christian ministries. I still visit here though because there are things regarding day to day interactions that I do not get from the other sites.
I am a Christian and I am using God to guide me. I guess you could call me a "stander." I am standing on the solid rock of Jesus to guide me. As He has been guiding me my home is much more orderly. I am learning more and more of the type of woman God wants me to be. I am teaching my children to pray on a regular basis. We do things together. I have noticed that my husband is interested in what we do and Praise the Lord, God has kept him very close to the children and I.
One thing I wanted to mention that I have seen over and over in countless marraige restoration testimonies is that God WILL bring the spouse home when the "stander" is ready. You never know what condition your beloved will be returned to you and therefore you must be READY. SOme spouses come home changed too some return more broken then when they first left, regardless ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE WITH GOD.
