Should I stay or should I go now...

[Floyd101]

I had a conversation with her yesterday through text. I sent her at text during the day just asking how she was getting along. I didn't get a reply until yesterday evening. She said, "hey you" and then told me she hadn't been feeling very well, had been dizzy and lightheaded most of the day, but was able to shower. She told me she was watching the olympics with her parents. I was watching it at the same time and diving was on. I told her I decided that I could be an olympic diver. She asked if it was because I was skinny, or because I was gay. I told her she should know I'm not gay...lol. She said she was teasing me. I replied by saying that i knew she was and I'd look good in a speedo. I didn't get a response which wasn't a big deal.

This morning I wake up to a text from her that she sent at 5am. She said she had tried to get me to wear a speedo for years and then said she'd hate to be a guy and get aroused wearing one of those. Then she said, "BTW...aaron is here this weekend."

That's when I realized that she was chatting with me while he was there and I thought about how some of the people here talk about their spouses having sneaky text conversations and things while they are around. It bothered me. So I won't be talking to her this weekend because of that.

I don't know what to do, because I don't want to be a jerk and not talk or respond to her at all, but I don't want to talk to her enough that she can be attached through an EA. I already told her that we wouldn't be ML anymore.

The more I think about how things have went since October, the more I realize that it's not meant to be. After going through what I went through with my divorce, I have had zero tolerance for people that have affairs. That's exactly what she is doing, and I don't want any part of it. When I broke up with her in October, she went and spent a weekend at her exboyfriends house. I found out just recently that she ML to him then. She continued to talk to him some after that while we were spending a lot of time together. I questioned her about it and she told me they were nothing more than friends. You don't go ML to just a friend. Sorry.

Letting go and moving on is hard, because I feel lonely and empty, but I know that it's what I have to do. Even if she does dump this guy, I don't know if I even want her back. Not now.