OH MY GAWDDDDDDDD!!!! Congratulations, Essie,this is AMAZING!!!!!!

wow, that is really interesting that he took you to see Andrea Bocelli. It sounds like *that* is a huge signal... maybe he really was scheming for a fireworks-pyrotechnic-lovemaking reunion (at his place) (which was now clean)?

Did you not want H to see how emotional you were? I can understand keeping him a bit arms length at this point, but it seems like at some point in the future you might want to let him *really* really * see you...

that is sooooo interesting that he was so lonely all these months!! And I'm proud of your 180s too!

I DON"T KNOW WHAT PASH MEANS< PLEASE EXPLAIN!!! Is that like... "making out" or something... more... specific???
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He told me he had even tidied his flat hoping that I might come home with him!


this is SO ADORABLE

OK, I got the feeling when I was reading your dialogue recreation, that maybe he kept apologizing because he felt like you didn't actually accept his apology? It seemed like he was trying to make a Very Strong Statement about Something Very Important... kind of a hollywood moment... and you (I could be reading this wrong) were treating it kind of casually. ???? You made me laugh when you said in the absence of inspiration you just kept your mouth shut \:\) I LOVE how you said 'we are the same people, but stronger and different' !!!!!

So... wow... maybe other WA's are sitting at home alone thinking, I didn't mean it when I said IDLYA, and thinking about their situation every day?????!!!!!!!

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The whole conversation was a total 180 for me. I used to talk / analyse our R all the time. Must have been so tedious for H. Anyway he really led the conversation. There were clearly things he had pre-thought about that he wanted to tell me. For me not to jump in and take over the conversation was really different. I liked the new me!


Wait... are you my twin???? I used to be the queen of overwhelming analysis too!! I love your new approach and OBVIOUSLY IT IS WORKING!
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Anyway I think we agreed that we would like to date each other. I made sure I played it very cool, nothing about a R, just about wanting to spend more time with each other. Followed by another long makeout session, and several suggestions from H that we could go back to his place for a bit of loving. I told him that I missed having sex with him. But left it at that. Not sure when I will be 'ready'... but I want him to invest more in our R before we start having sex again.


Wow!!! This is so great!!! I also really like how you want him to invest more before you start jogging horizontally again... I've pondered this myself and I like your solution \:\)
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I was also aware in the conversation that H is still quite selfish... like he is the one that has made new changes and re-invented himself, and that I need to get to know him. And that he only wants to come back if it suits him. He's still not really thinking about me, and that there is a possibility that I might not like the new H (or the old H for that matter!). Sort of assuming that I'm just going to fall into his arms. I guess before I commit to him I need to see that he isn't only going to think about himself, but thats a long way down the track... Remember I just want to have fun, and no pressure!! ha ha!! (I need to keep reminding myself!). And boy he doesn't realise that I've learned the rules of the game, and I'm going to make him work hard now!! He doesn't know that he's playing with a DB-er!


Wow, I didn't get the selfish vibe from your telling of the story... it seems like you are the one who's changed. But maybe he feels the same way as you? Maybe it is more symmetrical than you realize??

It's funny, I kind of assume that any of us would fall into our WA's arms given the carefully designed date you just experienced... but from everything I've read on the boards, taking it slow is the way to go--otherwise the WA usually gets freaked out and backs away. So a plus on the pacing!!!

Can't wait to hear what happens next!!!! it sounds like you've already gotten tons of good advice on your next move.

((((ESSIE))))
thank you for being such an inspiration!
LOVE,
T