Please help me to not give up............

[TwinDad]

Grant,

That is by no-means a rant. That was an excellent post!

She will allow me to come home, and says that she wont go to her sisters, if I can learn to live with the fact that it's over, and to just interact positively for the boys.

That is WAW speak for I am watching you, stop the R talks, give me space.....and spend time with the boys. This is huge because she will have an opportunity to show her your DB skills. An opportunity to excell. She is right your R is over, you didn't want that one anyways.....but there is always the possibility for another with your W.

Look at the results of your actions so far....OM has not been brought up....by you or her. See you can have an impact on her!

One strange thing today though. I went to pick up kids from Om's wife's house, and met her and briefly had a chat about our situations. She has no idea about her H and my wife, and because of the kids, and also the words from my wife that if I ever mentioned it, then it would destroy so many lives. I also think that right now, there is little to be gained by exposure of the situation to her. It would certainly destroy any last vestiges of hope for reconcilliation with W. She also said that her H (OM) was returning to family home this week. I feel she is deluded, and I felt sorry for her, but could not bring myself to give her anything further.

Or could it be that the OM, realized that leaving home wasn't everything he thought it would be....? You are right, it is not your place to tell the OM's W anything....absolutely not!

Some very good baby steps! Continue doing what you are doing