August - 2 months to go till a year of separation

[TwinDad]

Julia,

TD - did you mind you w not taking your name? How did it make you feel?

She took it legally but kept her name in all her business dealings. Over the next 5-6 years she converted to a yphenated version and finally just used my last name with her maiden as a middle initial. It has been a while, but I remember feeling a little hurt (it wasn't a major issue). When she explained it was for name recognition, I believe I asked her how long she planned on going on like....surely at some point they will figure out you have married.

I think now the difference is that I have realised that things can't stay the same and just demanding stuff without stating reasons isn't a great way to go about things. Also, that drive helps me to not give up and to carry on with this challenge, so it has its positive side.

Presentation is everything. Guys in general will do almost anything for the woman they love. The difference is in how that want is communicated. If it comes across as a demand then it will likely still get done there will just be resentment. If it comes across as "us doing a favor for you and it is appreciated" then we will do these until we are exhausted. There is a lot to be said about "asking" and not "telling". When I was an officer in the CG I always made a point to ask the people that work in my divion to do things even though I could have technically just ordered them to do so. Had a big impact on morale