On another thread I was following, an event occurred in which the LBS was bracing for the big blow & it never came.
It's been over a week since the "let's move this forward" e-mail & there's been no movement out of the M.
~"The big question becomes.. Why is he looking for control? See. you even wrote about it.. give it.. take it back.. give it again. The key.. lies.. somewhere between.. him giving.. then taking it back. Gotta expect.. it did not have the effect he was looking for."
It seems that my initial step way back from the dance threw H into a panic for any control he could regain & he pulled out the ole faithful's of;
-filing -keeping S5 more often -moving into more permanent housing (almost next door for good measure)
This has worked in the past, not doing the trick anymore now though. I still stand by only talk regarding the kids or important housing/family logistics.
`"So... he wants you to communicate.. under pressure? Me being the King of DAM and all.. I would say that you usually communicated the most clearly.. when you were under pressure. The Advanced DAM in me.. says he wants you to talk.."
I think your insight into the DAM world is accurate Cory.....he was going to get me to talk to him one way or another.
~"Make a choice. Understand why.. you made that choice. And move on."
Exactly. My choice is made....I feel really strong about it. I'm honoring my commitment & doing what looks to be necessary to allow him to see the value in honoring his.
I don't know if it was me putting Retrouvaille out there before I came back to "no unneccessary contact" or not, it does seem that he relaxed a bit & isn't trying to dynamite me out of my position.
There have been a lot of strange things though.
When I left the house at the same time he did to take S5 to dinner, he asked how late I'd be out. I told him not late, I'll make it an early night.
I get a call from him @ 8pm...no message & no answer when I return the call. I'm driving by my former husband's home & see his car there & him inside talking to his wife. He comes out w/S5 & says "Oh, there you are. My battery went dead on my phone. I knew you were going to be out late & wanted to know how late." Comes back to the house & spends another hour w/S.
Next day takes S5 to a concert & calls me to tell me it's packed & he's going to park in the red.
Uh, Okay ;-)
Guess he just likes to keep me informed.
~"Long story short.. She will resemble you.. one day."
