[ernest88]

I want to believe he's the person I thought he was. Shouldn't I give him a chance to show me one way or the other? Or, do you think it's a lost cause? I do enjoy his newly rediscovered kindness and would be happy to remain friends with him... but if we could be as happy as we were in the very early days - wow!

It's pretty clear he's not what he was when you first met.

Only you can truly decide how much time you're willing to give him.

I think you should have hope until the end but I also think that a WAS needs to put forth concrete actions which show they are changing and willing to work on the M and in your H's case that should be, 1. total transparency and dumping of the OW, like yesterday. 2. stop hiding things from you in locked boxes. 3. stop using sex as something to keep you in the M and give you hope..it's like he dangling some type food he knows you can't resist..he's using sex to keep you in the M. That borders on abuse in my book. 4. I think the old boy is a playa..he's playing you and I bet he plays OW the same way.

I do enjoy his newly rediscovered kindness and would be happy to remain friends with him... but if we could be as happy as we were in the very early days - wow!

friendship is a good start. and if you can be happy again and he can stop cake eating and treat you/cherish you like you deserve then I say GOOD ON HIM and GOOD ON YOU..if he can't then I say let him go eat cake..

you hang in there and stop letting him disrespect you. Don't tolerate that chitt from man, woman or any other thing..