The Door That Never Closes!

[Treese]

Thanks for the advice....I need tons of it now....I really don't think I would make good decisions right now....I'm not emotionally stable....

Went to get the mail and guess what.....my H got another letter for the child support agency....I think it's a slow painful death for me...

He picked up son from baseball tonight then came over and came in..I thought I told him yesterday to pick him up and drop him off in the driveway....I didn't want to make a scene in front of the kids so I didn't....When H came in...he started the small talk....like it was another day and like I'm just going to get over everything in a day....I really don't get any of this.....I decided not to stay in the same room as H cause I didn't want to say anything I would regret....D16 came in the kitchen where we all were at one point...I was gathering trash and she was asking me questions....H was speaking directly to her and she totally blew him off.....it was so obvious.....and a teacher at school, I work at the H. S. my d goes to...told me my D prayed for me in class today...said D looks very withdrawn....I realize she is worried about me and what is going to happen to us....I can only assure her that we will be together as a family wherever that may be....if we sell the house we build a new home somewhere else...my kids are scared....and so am I....I told this teacher who knows the whole story....she is a good friend of mine...that I don't know how I get up in the morning anymore....she said I don't know how you do it either but I'm praying for you....I said thanks....

I went upstairs after the trash and started to watch TV....heard the door close and looked out the window...H was leaving...he didn't say goodbye...but I didn't care...I just came back downstairs and watched TV with my son....

One good thing about being back to work is that I go to bed earlier cause I get up at 5:15...I"m not sleeping much if any but at least I'm laying in bed....

off to rest.....thanks everyone for all your support....

((((((hugs to everyone)))))))