San, I am new to this and posted my story only 2 days ago. My story is about trying to repair the M after I had the affair... but as I have been the other woman who gave up the affair , I can tell you it is very very hard as the A is often made up of what you did not get in the marriage ... BUT it is rarely strong enough to sustain a lifelong commitment. The A is a relationship built on deceit and a very shaky ground. To me ( and I thought i loved the man whom i was having the A like I had never loved before ) it would never have survived the turmoil of D.
Do not give up . I believe whether it is 1 month, 1 year or whatever your H will come to his senses and see the OW is not what he thought. How could they trust each other anyway. You must be patient and strong and show your kids courage. I say let them know you are hurt and sad but not to the extent that you cannot function. Be brave and I think doing waht every one says - GAL will exactly what you end up doing and he will see the attractiveness in that. ( If only i could take my own advice some days ... I know it is so hard )
My fight is for the family and marriage. Just one day once my husband left me ( a year after discoovery ) a light went on for me. My husband decided he could not live with the lies anymore and made a decsision. I felt that decision and having been fighting to save the M ever since.
