I told her I'm done with that. If she wants to have a discussion, we'll take turns for a minute, no interrupting. "But everything you say is full of lies", she says. I mentioned e-mail for discussions.
Yes, e-mail will help. Another thing than can help is the I feel/felt/found statements. You've undoubtedly heard this before, but, as a reminder for me Between two people, there are three versions of reality. What you experienced and remember, what she experienced and remembers, and what the video feed shows. Since, none of us is the video feed, all we can say about the nature of reality is "this is how it seemed to me","this is what I remember","this is how I felt about xyz"
Another thing while I'm streaming consciousness. Trust is built up by repeated actions over time. Frankly, we can trust someone to act like a jerk and be surprised if they don't. So, the picking a fight with you will I imagine fade over time as she sees that you've had identity level change and you aren't just putting on the changes.
I'll offer up one more thought as it's something that I think about frequently. As you change and grow in confidence and as your willingness to tolerate BS decreases, the potential for conflict arises and my impression is that it's easy for the WAS to look at the fact there is a conflict and determine that nothing has changed, when the reality is that there has been lots of change and now they are in the position of needing to grow and change in order to relate to you in a mature adult manner.
Oh, Jon, congratulations on the weekend. You did great.
Between two people, there are three versions of reality. What you experienced and remember, what she experienced and remembers, and what the video feed shows. Since, none of us is the video feed, all we can say about the nature of reality is "this is how it seemed to me","this is what I remember","this is how I felt about xyz"
