I have been completely exhausted and unable to update. I'm sorry for not commenting on your threads as well... I just feel so drained.
It's obvious that my husband and I have a HUGE communication problem. Apparently he was only joking around when he said "talking messes things up" and the comment about friends with benefits. To his benefit, we were joking around before he made those comments...
Yesterday he asked how I was and I told him I didn't sleep well. He said I should "come home" and I told him that I heard what he had to say on Sunday and going home only confuses things for me. I'm ready to make a clean break and that friends with benefits doesn't work for me. That's when he said he was only joking around and that this was a prime example of my hyper-sensitivity. I'm not doing a great job of conveying what was said.
We ended up going to dinner together. I told him I thought he was very confused and he asked if we could consider this a "separation" rather than a definite road to divorce. I told him I would be OK with that, but there was a lot of stuff that needed to be discussed, thought over, etc.
We do not communicate well at all. I'm thinking if I do decide to give this another try, RETRO will be an absolute MUST... but I still don't know what I want at this point. I'd like time to think about what exactly I NEED. I need to visualize my ideal marriage and tell him exactly what my expectations will be for the future. He still says he's concerned that he won't be able to make me happy forever.
I think my absence from home is more painful than he realized and I think he's starting to understand what a giving wife I have been.
I don't buy any of what he said. He is so full of it his breath stinks. he's getting it like he wants from two different women. he likes it. He's a playa..
I'm sorry sis..I just don't buy his BS. I don't mean to offend but I know guys like this..and it's all script.
