Signed the separation papers yesterday and he signs for the his townhouse 23 Aug. Our plans are to tell our 11 year old D 30 Aug about the separation. H wants to take time in Sept to have D help fix up his new place and get used to the idea of being separated. H asked yesterday if I had thought about what to say if D refuses to accept our separation news. Told him I thought she had to abide by the adults decision. Later on in the evening I asked if he knew what he was going to tell her if she became stubborn that a separation wasn't going to happen. Said he had no idea. This whole thing is so sad because I know in my heart if the OW was out of the picture we could make this marriage work. Unfortunately, the OW is getting exactly what she wants now and the next will be a divorce probably in about 6 mos which is the minimum time for VA. Still trying to "act as if" but doesn't seem to be doing much good. He has managed to make sure he will not be around much in Aug with 3 business trips planned (at least 1 of which he is seeing the OW who lives in LA)so I guess I won't have much opportunity for more DBing except on the phone and that's assuming he even asks to speak to me. I know all I can do is try to keep a PMA which is really hard right now. I think he keeps hoping I'll move into the townhouse and he, our D, and his 86 yr old father can stay in our house. H keeps focusing on my D's safety with just me in the house yet we live in a very safe neighborhood. I just keep reassuring him she will be fine. He seemed a little aggravated that I visited with our friends after the papers were signed last night. Stopped by the friends, but didn't tell him where I was going. Truthfully, after signing the papers I didn't think it was any of his business any longer. I don't really want to resort to the "after LRT" yet but since the A seems to be continuing should I start when he moves out? Feeling very lost today with no direction. Need support and guidance!
