Yuck, Red...I'm sorry you had a blow up last night.
I completely identify with your feelings of insecurity--they're real consequences of his actions, and sometimes it seems like we'll never be truly comfortable because there is so much that we DON'T KNOW. I was having a hard time with this a couple weeks ago...wondering what they said to each other, what they did, did he touch her the same, did he want to spend every moment with her, does he miss her, what if I'm not as much fun? Blah, blah, blah. I started dreaming about it. And almost asked him about it. But I caught myself, because here is the truth: I can't trust what he'd say anyway. Because of course he'd reassure me, and I'd think he was just saying what I wanted to hear, that he wasn't telling me the truth, etc.
So, I talked myself through it (and posted a little bit), looked at his ACTIONS...which say he's happy and loves me and our kids. And I'm feeling better. No it's not going to disappear, but I think it will become easier to deal with as we keep moving forward and have more positive ground behind us.
I'm glad he came back and was sweet with you. Hang on to that hon. It means a lot.
