H deep in A & MLC, need support 4 roller coaster!

[Dawn of Hope]

Dawn you are doing good. Continue to make changes for you. Try to figure out what was it that went wrong in the m in your h's perspective and if it makes sense work on those areas.

I was thinking, it would be best for h to be home rather than separated, but after reading your posts maybe I am glad h is gone to deal with his own issues. It seems like it would be tough in your sitch.

Only you can decide when enough is enough. Hang in there!

Glam,
Thanks for checking in with me and posting! It's always nice to get a second (or third, or 30th) opinion!

Yes, I'm still working on me, and also doing what I can about the things he has complained about. Not changing as fast as I was at first (he once commented about that time period: "You changed practically EVERYTHING in only two months!"), and a little backsliding here and there, but not too bad, and I'm continuing to move forward. I am taking everything he says with an entire salt lick, but looking for the tiny nuggets of reality/truth buried within his MLC nonsense. Certainly would not suggest I'm doing it perfectly, but definitely much improved in many areas; to the point that the only thing he really complains about any more is all past stuff that I'm no longer doing, or that my changes were "too little too late" (sound familiar, anyone??) and that he doesn't know if they will stick. Hey, buddy, have you noticed that it's now been 11 months since I started implementing these changes? How long are you planning to give it?? Sigh. Still completely lost in the fog.

I thought I might mention that we actually had a few minutes of normal conversation tonight, which has been pretty rare in the last 10 months or so. Didn't last terribly long, and I had to encourage it a little (don't think I did anything pushy or anti-DB), but it was a definite improvement from the wary one-word responses I usually get. I am not holding my breath in anticipation that this means a corner has been turned, but it was nice.

Oh, by the way, Glam, yes, I think it would be a lot easier for me in a lot of ways if he weren't living here, but I'm not going to throw him out...for now.

Okay, 4:45 a.m., time to go to bed.

Peace,
Dawn