I somehow feel she is not done with Frank. While she is on her own, I think it is very possible that she will realize what she is going to lose in him. Will it be enough to change her life?
Even if one of you files for a D, in the state of California there is a 6 month wait - that is a long time and a lot can happen before anything is final.
You probably need to determine some conditions you need before you let her back into your life. Let her be the one to convince you that the marriage can be repaired. Keep an open mind.
