Sandi is here and things are getting better!

[OnTheEdge22]

Sandi - I'm glad you posted an update and I'm glad you're still hanging in there.

I don't think your feeling of being tired and worn out in the relationship has anything to do with your age. My almost WAW is 45, still very active, fit, sexy (a personal trainer), but I think she feels the exact same way about me. She doesn't feel attracted to me, or intimate, etc... I think it is just a sympton of being an almost WAW.

My W read about a study somewhere that like 90% of all couples that get past a possible divorce and stay together another 5 years say that they are happier in their marriages then they ever have been. So, I'm hoping that time and patience are our gifts and that there will be light at the end of the tunnel. I know you don't feel it right now, but pray and believe that it will get better -- that's what I'm doing.

One thing I'll add from being on the other side of a WAW is that your husband might appreciate just a hug, a kiss, etc..., once in a while -- maybe just to tell him you still care about him and you appreciate all the things he is doing. I hope you tell him that. I know when my wife notices some of my 180's and says something about it, I feel a great sense of accomplishment and it makes me want to do more.

As for the TV at night, is there anything that will get your H away from it? Have you told him that it bores you, bothers you, etc...? Maybe suggest a walk. Go shopping. Read together. Play a board game or some cards. Anything but sit in front of the TV. I used to be addicted to the TV too, and that was one of my W's complaints, but I told her that I watched TV because I was bored, not because I enjoyed it that much. That's how bad our relationship got. I don't watch much anymore at all.

Anyhow, hang in there and be patient. Try to see the good in your H and hopefully some of those feelings will surface again.