You have to do this in order for a chance to keep her. You can always go and be her "friend" and "have at least a good relationship with her" later. Believe me, she isn't being nice to you to win you back right now...she is being nice to ease her guilt and make it all "ok". If she is trying to have a relationship with you right now it is NOT for marriage. She hasn't stopped seeing the OM and she moved out so her motives are not for the marriage.
If she tries to get you going on a convo one thing you could do is cut her off and say, "Have you looked at the retrovaille information? WHat do you think?" so she gets the idea that you want nothing to do with her friendly chit chat and nicey nicey happy happy unless she wants to DO SOMETHING about the marriage. If she is short about it, say, "Ok, well, unless there is something about the kids, I have to get going."
You're going to be ok, h4h. We are all here for you. We all know it is hard. YOu can do this.
