I'm sorry your weekend was tough. You knew it would be, and it will be like this for a while. I read a part from a Dr. Seuss book today that made me think of you (Oh the Places You Go):
"All Alone! Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you'll be quite a lot. And when you're alone, there's a very good chance you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won't want to go on. But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike. And I know you'll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are. You'll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You'll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life's a Great Balancing Act."
You are amidst the balancing act right now. That peace you felt when watching the sunset. You will feel that more and more as you give yourself time. You are doing well. This is the tough time. You COULD have called your W to chat, you COULD have called B, you COULD have called anyone, but you DIDN'T and that is SOOO GOOOD. Going through this is what has to be done, and seeking someone to make you happy while going through this (some female) is not healthy.
Couple things I read from your post that I want to comment on. She made sure she didn't ask for a "coke" from you (she doesn't want to have to NEED you for ANYTHING). She had the candles on, has her apartment all cozy and "happy", showing you she is FINE. She has you over for dinner....showing how things are JUST FINE...."we can have family dinners sometimes"....already got everything planned about how everything will be fine. She thinks that even though she is leaving you, she will be HAPPY, and there will still be "FAMILY DINNERS" so she is not breaking the family, she is still keeping things just FINE. That is her mindset. Make sure to be showing her that things are NOT FINE.
Ok, that being said, you remained the strong confident man and didn't "give in" to being all "happy happy aren't we all happy" while you were there (at least it didn't seem like it). AND, she looked at the retro info. That's good.
Reminder for the week: Don't call, email, text, chit chat with her unless it is for the kids ONLY. INstead, have fun doing things without her. You will need to find what that is. NOT calling B. When seeing her, you are all business and all about the kids, happy, confident, and polite.
