Please help me to not give up............

[TwinDad]

Grant,

Glad that you haven't given up. 19 years of M doesn't just evaporate.......

Here is a to-do list

1) Work on your self....physically (find the time) and emotionally. Rebuild your conifidence....know that you are going to be ok....don't just say it...know it! GAL. The easiest way is to spend time with your kids going to events you will meet other dad's there.

2) Take care of your family. Mainly your sons. Regardsless of what happens between you and your W, you are still their dad. Bonus: There are few things more attractive to woman than a man who is spending time with her children....the fact that they are also yours is a win-win.

3) Figure out where you need to make changes. Surely you and your W have had numerous R talks or complaint sessions leading up to here. (Don't ask her again).....but what was she really asking where can you make changes that make you a better person.

If I was in your sitch, I would do everything possible to be closer to my children. Your W is even asking you to do the same. You say you will be destitute......will you really, fully exlplore your options (maybe commute two days stay in london 2 days so you are home for at least part of the day on 5 of the days)......where there is a will there is a way! It could be your absense on a daily basis has had a play in your W's unhappiness, he connection with the OM....etc. I am not looking to blame you, just put things in perspective.

You can do this!