Journaling... Actually today was a nice day, I made plans for the Labour Day weekend, and I'm looking forward to it. I'm finding myself up a lot more than down these days.... but just when you make it through a threshold... something stupid hits you.
Friday night... all I wanted to do was get out of the house and not have to eat ... alone. I'm trying to mind my weight, so I don't eat out often,... but it's nice to be round other folks and just drink in the atmosphere of being around other humans.
But... it's Friday... not much luck actually finding a table for 1. I even went later... 7 pm thinking ok... that'll be enough time for the families to get through their dinners. It's a pizza /italian food place... oh well, I can go tomorrow. I actually drove around to a couple of other restos... but you know when you've had your heart set on something and suddenly you dont really find yourself hungry for anything else... so I headed home and had a quick bite here.
Dammit, ya know,... there are a lot of things I hate about what and how our spouses have treated each and every one of us who've filled the pages of this forum... It's just times like this... the little things sometimes that can bring you on the verge of tears. The b@stards! They've upheaved our lives... and for what?... a roll in the hay with someone new?... to run away from dealing with REAL LIFE? MLCs, finding themselves, blah blah.
Something an old friend said to me today (telling me about his sitch that happened years ago and is similar to ours)... he said: Until they can treat you and SEE you again as a person... someone they've hurt, they're missing the point. It took my ex wife YEARS to finally get that.
It really drove home the point to me that I... we... deserve to be treated better. Common decency, as A person.
I will always love my H, but I truly deserved better than this. Life shouldn't be filled with this kind of turmoil. especially since... All I wanted was a f'g pizza.
Abbey
Last edited by Abbey; 08/16/0812:52 AM.
T:22, M:20 H:55 Me:45 H-OW PA: N/07 OW Jan08 Bomb:Feb/08 S: Apr/08 Back together Ap1/09-Sept/11 Oct, 2011, uncertain future/H is a mess. Dec/11 - Doin'friend mode. Some days are better than others.
