Thank you so much for your honest evaluation of your respective sitch. Your answers seem to come from hearts that are in limbo. I too, am drifting in a white water river filled with rocks and whirlpools with no paddles to control my way. In the last 3 months of my sitch I have hit many rocks and have been caught in eddies that spun me around in circles of confusing emotions. I know if I hang on to this little rubber raft of hope that I may just find the calming waters of a new beginning with my S. Please, take no offence, but I wish that none of us were here for our respective reason.
I have a few other questions that I hope you will be able shine light on. I do realize that every sitch is deferent, but some information is better than none.
[lost3031]
Does your S is or wants to work things out and get back together? If the S wants to? Do you want to? What is holding things up? How much time are you willing to wait?
"Have I had a great epiphany about whether I should continue being a WAS or return home? Not yet - but I'm hoping that comes soon." Can you elaborate?
[HOPFULinCALI]
"I didn't find that I was looking for. What I wanted was right in front of me. Unfortunately by the time I realized it he was no longer interested in making it work" I am very sorry.
What were you trying to find? and How long did it take you before you realized you want to go back? What was in front of you?
Questions for anyone.
We have not been around each other for almost 3 months. We have emailed and visited on the phone, but no face to face. The tenor of the contacts has been friendly. I think I have gotten strong enough to be around her without falling apart and maintain my emotions.
Do you think it is better to start meeting face to face? Please explain Do you think meeting face to face will help things move along with my DBing? Please explain.
My W has a birthday coming up soon. I have always sent her flowers and a card to her at the office on her birthday. When she dropped the bomb, she said she didn't want me to send flowers or cards to try and make up. I have been given advice that fall in deferent directions. 1) Call her up and ask her if she would like to go to lunch or dinner for her Birthday. If she does that fine, if she doesn't want too that is fine as well. 2) Just send her an email wishing a Happy Birthday and nothing else. This way she knows that I did not forget it, but I am also respecting her wishes of no cards or flowers. What do you think?
