Start thinking hard about what life would be like without your W, because it's quite possible it could go that way. The positive changes you have made will only help you, going forward. With or without her.
Are you setting goals? No matter how small, they are important. If you are setting goals and they are not being met...then, well, you have to ask yourself if you are willing to stay on this path.
It's OK if you do, but equally OK if you don't. It doesn't make you a bad person.
Only you will know when you have had enough.
Me: 54 Her: 50 and sexy as hell M: 32yrs T: 34yrs Bomb: Sept 26-07 "lost our emotional connection" Bomb 2: Dec 25-07 she's "not feeling desire" She asked if she could come home Apr 26-08! Everything's GREAT!
thank you so much Mink. I realy value your inout. I still have the " cheet sheet" you made me. I am sometime very afraid she is trying to force my hand i a D because she knows she has done nothing to make it better and now wants to look like the victim still.
Well my W met me today at the bank to get the truck in her name. She was a half hour late. When it was all over I gave her a check for half of what was left in the old account even though she didn’t deposit any in there for a month. She told me since we are separating this we should also talk about “moving along” with the D. I told her point blank “ W this is YOUR decision to make you know were I stand” she looked at me for a few seconds and said she just doesn’t look at me the same way, she doesn’t have it in her to get back together so I relied “ again this is YOUR decision to make if you want to move along to be happy so be it I wish you the best but YOU need to make that choice. I will not put my life on hold for you but for now I do love you very much and I want this to work but if YOU don’t then YOU need to make that choice.”
And that was that I find out next week if she gets a co-signer and we split the cells next week as well.
wow just wow now shes refusinf to take the truck, AND since i OWE her for some depts she wants me to let her have it till sept and STILL make a payment. she fiqures that way she will take that off my BILL!!! at first I told her fine, ya know be a DBer and show her understanding....but then i thought HEY!! shes trying to get me to pay for a truck thats shes driving whuile I drive the crap car. so i just called her backl and told her i need the truck this weekend because im heading out of town and my car wont make the trip. We could either sitch the truck then or just let me borrow it but I want to use it. also we need to split the cell phones so we could make the swich on friday my day off and do both.
Shes treeting this like im attacking her but im just sick of her being the one who moved out and still wanting me to be a F'in suger daddy while she makes no moves to reconciel
Of course she doesn't want the crappy car. And she knows your a pushover (sorry). Now, she may actually have a point if you owe her money. Do the math and make sure you're not getting screwed. It could be a way to repay her the money...but figure that out later. If you need the car now, tell you need it.
Splitting things up in hard. My h and I just split our cell phones, and that was a tough one for me as well. Not financially, but just not being on a "family plan" anymore.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
wow just wow now shes refusinf to take the truck, AND since i OWE her for some depts she wants me to let her have it till sept and STILL make a payment. she fiqures that way she will take that off my BILL!!! at first I told her fine, ya know be a DBer and show her understanding....but then i thought HEY!! shes trying to get me to pay for a truck thats shes driving whuile I drive the crap car. so i just called her backl and told her i need the truck this weekend because im heading out of town and my car wont make the trip. We could either sitch the truck then or just let me borrow it but I want to use it. also we need to split the cell phones so we could make the swich on friday my day off and do both.
Shes treeting this like im attacking her but im just sick of her being the one who moved out and still wanting me to be a F'in suger daddy while she makes no moves to reconciel
Seperate is seperate , if it was me.. well i'd say nope.. but in my sich i got the brand new car, which has payments on it, and she got the paid off 2003 truck.. so she now has to make half my payments on my car for the next 4 years..
I did the cell phone today, off the family plan and onto my own phone.. more seperation to come, she was also removed from my life policy today and it has now been granted to my nieces. I will however leave her on my dental/medical for now.. doesn't cost me much.
Isn't everyone automatically covered for medical and dental in Canada sawks? Maybe I don't understand. What about the gym membership? Sorry to hijack Marcum, but a lot of us are in the same boat.
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
i did call her. if she needs a new car then fine go get one. My car is on its last legs and heck she needs to start being responsiable anyway. I just want to DB here but i dont see a way to help our sitch. I do see DBing as takeing care of yourself as well as the R. So i will see what happnes. If I donr here from her by friday I will have to re-call her. God this is turning ugley but I DO need to stop being a pushover and she needs to know that neither of us can get everything.
Well she responded and said I could take the car now. she was actualy very adult about it...untill she spilled the beans she's looking at a 08 honda civic. lol she couldnt take a 07 for 13k but wants a o8 for 18k.. a well. we actualy had a nice cinversation after. I asked about her dad and she said thank you. .... another day in the trenches.
Isn't everyone automatically covered for medical and dental in Canada sawks? Maybe I don't understand. What about the gym membership? Sorry to hijack Marcum, but a lot of us are in the same boat.
No, in Alberta we have to pay for our healthcare, but it's going free in January-09. Dental is not free unless you are a low income person.
I told her politely that my work only covers me for "wellness" so my membership is paid for hers is not, i should not have to put that on my visa.
She dropped the car off today. didnt even call or anything .....just dropped it off in my apartment complexes firelane.... i dont know why shes acting like i started all of this. i love her... yes i still do. but shes not even remotley taking anything i do as anything less then a direct attack.
