I wasn't referring to my D18s teenage behaviour when I said it was a step backwards I just meant that after the good news I got yesterday the shine is taken off it b/c my daughter is suffering. I've been hearing all day from friends who have kids the same age. Most of them have not done as well as D18 in terms as actual grades and yet they aren't having to go through the agony she is of applying to uni through clearing. I just wish for once that my family didn't have to fight for everything it gets. It would just be nice if, just for once, things went according to plan.
D18 wants to be a pharmacist and will make a very good one. I know I work with them all day! I think that is what is making today even harder. I too applied to uni to study pharmacy but I didn't even pass my A levels. I'm still in the field but at a lesser grade and it drives me crazy every single day b/c I know I too would make a much better pharmacist than some of the people I work with who are one! It's almost like it has opened up yet another old wound for me. I can feel her pain so acutely b/c I experienced it myself first hand. I didn't have the options she got. There was no point in even considering clearing with the abismal grades I got and I wasn't offered the opportunity to resit the exams. My parents never sat any exams so for them it was simple I didn't get in so I got a job. That sounds like they didn't want the best for me. Of course they did. I had done the 'sensible' thing and got myself a job as a fall back position so I just fell into it I suppose. I don't want D18 to have to settle for second best like I did and she knows that if she wants to she can stay on at college for another year and resit. Of course there are no guanrantees but I can't deny her this dream. It's all she wants out of life right now.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
