For the Guy with Kids and a WW 9

[whatdidido]

Yes! Give her the packet no matter what. Good, good, good.

She is falling apart, h4h. She can't find stuff, her kids are getting frustrated with her, she misses the kids, she can't sleep cause she knows what she is doing is WRONG, her living situation sucks, she sees you and the kids all happy together WITHOUT her, you don't want the "crumbs" she throws to you anymore, ....she is THINKING BIG TIME. Good, good, good.

You are doing soooo well, h4h. Stay strong. You are fighting for your family and your marriage and you will NEVER regret this.

I'm going to pray for you right now.

[hopeful4her]

She got back. Stayed outside for at least 15 minutes. The girls didn't notice until that time. They went outside. GBG and S14 must have gone back to the apartment to get his things. The girls started to bring in some of their toys. A couple boxes. GBG and S14 were apparantly sitting outside talking. They all came back inside. She talked to the girls. I was in the kitchen trying to find something to do. I hear her mention about taking the little momma dog with her. She sounded joking, but I knew better. She is missing. I should have left it at that. But...
"Go ahead. Take Moe."
"I think I will."
She picks her up and I get her the dog leash. I ask if she has dog food and she says yes. Saying goodbye. She stands with S14 and tells him how strong people we are. We can get through things.

Something is going on. GBG and I had a little discussion earlier about S14 and his being on Myspace a lot and him questioning his sexuality. She mentions that he met a friend on Myspace that attends the high school he is going to attend. That she met him, too. I have a unapproving look on my face.
"I feel like we encourage him by not limiting his time on the internet or something. I hope he is just confused."
"We just need to be careful how we talk to him."
"He spends way to much time on that stupid thing."
"He is hardly on it at the apartment."
"You are GONE all day. He is probably on it all damn day. Don't you think?"

Anyway, she is leaving. Saying goodbye. The girls seem more concerned that the dog is leaving. We give each other eye contact.
"I'll call you later."
The look told me something is going on with him.

I walk her to the door. She mouths to me to talk to him. Don't talk AT him. I mouth back that I will talk to him. It'll be ok.
She looks at me and quietly says "bye".
"Be careful."

I'm pacing. Pacing. ARGHHHHH!!! SH*T!!! Starting to sweat.

I give a few minutes. Waiting for her to turn her lights on. She hasn't yet. She should be in the car by now.

I grab the packet and walk out the door. Car is on, but no lights. I see her sitting in the car. Hugging the steering wheel. Just looking.

Crying. She can't open her window, so she opens the door.

"You alright?"
She nods, wiping her tears. I hand her the packet. She looks REALLY surprised. Maybe she thinks its D papers?

"I've been wanting to give this to you." She takes the packet.
"I'd like you to look at it. I have mentioned something about it a couple times before. If I don't get a response from you on it, then I'll know my answer."
She is looking at me, teary eyed.
"I've had them and wasn't sure if I would give them to you, but I told myself that if I didn't, I would never forgive myself. Take them and read through it all."
She is looking at it. She places it on her dashboard in front of her.
"I know that you think that there being an us.....would be really painful for you."
She is looking at me again.
"But sometimes, you never know. It might not be. Just do me a favor and look it over."
She nods. Wiping her eyes.
"Ok" she says.
"Okay, be careful going home."

SH*T! Why did I call her apartment home?

I close her door for her and go inside. She didn't drive off until a minute after I got in.

Whewwww! I did it. I gave it to her. The ball, as usual, is in her court. I did my part.

BTW, her fave cousin from Laredo called me before she got back. We talked for about 25 minutes. Asking if I'm ok. He told me that GBG's older sister has spoken to his mom. GBG's favorite aunt. SIL says she doesn't understand her sister. That I was always there for her sister. Through her sickness, taking care of her son(nephew), and more. I am surpised to hear this. We talk some more. They are good people.

I feel good.

[whatdidido]

:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

I'm soooooooooooooooooooooo happy for you. I bet you DO feel good. You did it. You have given her something that can give her hope when she thought there was none. You have given her another decision, too. That SHE now has to make. I hope she makes a good one. You said everything sooo well. I prayed for you, h4h. I have a good feeling about it. Either way, things are going to be ok for you.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((h4h))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

You are handling everything very well.

[whatdidido]

I waited up for you, but now I have to get to bed.....almost midnight here, and I'm sleepy. Have a restful sleep, and I will check on you tomorrow. You've done a big thing, and I know how hard it was for you.

[hopeful4her]

dub,
THANK YOU for your prayers. I just knew you were going to stay up. How could you not.

You made me laugh to myself.

Good night, Sweetpea.

AT,
Yeah... Me. Trying to taking some baby steps in that direction. I have started to lurk over there.

NOW I feel like I have done and offered everthing I can. I feel at peace, finally.

At least right now. Letting her go is the hardest thing I have ever done.

[lost_in_space]

H4H

Just one thing to say...

ATTABOY!

[hopeful4her]

Thanks, Canuck

I sure hope that's not a derogatory term. Sometimes I say stupid sh*t.

[lost_in_space]

Once a Canuck, always a Canuck

Eh?

[hopeful4her]

Sorry, but the only Canadian speak I know I learned from Dave Thomas and Rick Moranis

And don't get me started on Rush and Triumph. (i've got my rock and roll hook 'em horns sign up)

Good day, eh?

[lost_in_space]

A canuck is fine, just don't call me a hoser, eh?