Yes, I can see that - I've been lying awake since 6...so this is the end of the road for us and the beginning of the road for me. I've got one of those horrible sinking lost feelings. Like your standing in a grubby bus station somewhere at 6am, everyone else seems to be rushing about getting on with their lives and speaking a different language. You dont know where you are headed, you dont know where the ticket office is, you feel foolish and useless because what should be exciting, isnt, you feel just feel afraid and lonely. But you know you have no choice but to go find out and make a plan. You worry the bus will be crowded and hostile and take you to the wrong place,or the journey will be hard. (this happened to me in Turkey and China, so I'm not making this up!). It feels like an ordeal, but you suspect it will make a great story one day...
The other thing I was lying awake thinking was what you just said:
Quote:
It seems cruel of him to do all those activities with you and then just fade away. Maybe it was his way of checking that you were doing ok kind of on your own,not realising how high your hopes were. When he realised that he felt a clean break was kinder. Who knows
Exactly that, so thanks for spotting it! It was cruel of him. Thats the bit I cant get my head around, he's been such a good and loyal friend to me for 12 years, he really has been patient and consistent and kind. And I have been good to him and especially in the past year. So its incomprehensible to me that he could be so cruel. I think I will ask him though. I'm sorry your H did the same to you.
Ali x
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
