Did they? If they did, it was because they strove for it, they always worked to be better and understood and communicated their needs wants and dreams to their loved one.
Last night while watching Taiko drummers from Japan, my wife curled into me and thanked me for the surprise with a kiss.
And I realized that I had to struggle to remember the pain of this.
I remember writhing on the ground tearing handfuls of grass up when I ruptured my knee, but the pain?
Like this I can remember what I did, but not how the pain felt. I understand what you are going through but not the pain or struggle anymore.
I no longer get mad when I think of my wife and the OM…a little sad still, but even that is faded and frayed.
I’m out of touch to be offering advice.
Selfishly, I am glad of being out of touch…I remember that the pain sucks, I know enough not to want it again.
Trying to remember the pain, and offering perspectives from my past, I wonder if it is hampering my present; sometimes it does.
I struggle to remember the ideas that got me through, but several stand out.
Patience.
Be patient.
You can do this one day at a time.
Become the person you want to see in the mirror.
For those who have it, of course you can drop me a line.
I’m not saying goodbye, just goodbye for now.
I wouldn’t be here if not for my friends here, one and all, too numerous to list and I’m too stupid to get every one of you down on this thread, so rather than accidentally leave someone out, you know who you are.
Jack / Jeff
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Your words of encouragement, the pats on the back, and the occasional kick in the rump have given me a lot of support and made my journey thus far so much easier and bearable. Thank you.
Go and enjoy your life.
Me: 47 Kids: 2 boys, 14 & 8 Bomb: 5/5/08 Married: 16 years, together 20 Divorce final 8/11/10 I remarried, to an amazing woman: 3/17/12... "Once in awhile, in an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale"
Jack, THANK YOU for all you've done for me! I appreciate EVERY OUNCE of it all! Unfortunately, I don't have your info, but do check in every once in a while if you can. x0x0x!
I hope you DO live happily ever after, J/J. Hard fought and well earned!
And as for knowing of someone who got to the point where they can't even remember the bad stuff anymore, who saw it fade away from their life - well, that's just priceless.
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!