[girlfromipanema]

Thanks for the love, everyone. Kerry, I haven't seen SBIM again. I've spoken to him on the phone a couple of times, but don't have any firm plans to see him again just yet. He has a dreamy voice, though. That accent of his is delicious.

Things are going well for me. Tomorrow is my 4 year anniversary. I think I'll be sleeping at my new place by then.

Last night I was shopping for essentials (iron, ironing board, pillows, etc.) and I was so angry that I'M the one out replacing my things when I'M the one that tried so desperately to save my marriage. However, I realize that I am also the one making the choice to do so. I could demand my husband replace the items, but what's the point? He's busy with work. I'll just provide him an itemization of the replacement items and he can pay me a portion of the expense. Sounds fair enough, doesn't it?

I found a Lionel Ritchie CD while shopping. I love the song 'Goodbye' - perfect for my current state of being.

I wanted you for life.
You and me for always.
I never thought there would come a time,
That our story would end.
It's hard to understand,
But I guess I'll have to try.
It's not easy to say good-bye

For all the joy we share
For All that time we had to spare
Now if I had one wish,
I would want forever back again.
To look into your eyes and to hold you when you cry.
It's not easy to say good-bye

I can remember all those great times we had.
There were so many memories,
Some good, some bad.
Yes and through it all
Those memories will last forever.

There's peace in where you are
May be all I need to know.
If I listen to my heart
I'll hear your laughter once more.
And so I got to say, I'm just glad you came my way.
It's not easy to say good-bye

If only I could figure out a way to hold on to the beautiful memories of my relationship while letting go of any lingering feelings of rejection, sadness, bitterness and resentment... I'm working on it, but it's a process for sure.

I'm thinking of giving him an anniversary card - maybe something gushy and inside I'll simply write: "Soooooo loooooong sucka!"