Ali gave you some excellent advice and insight into your H. Let it go and show some compassion. Pretend you have two choices:
Choice #1 - Remind your H of how what he has done is wrong through your actions and words and thus hamper or even eliminate his desire to get back together.
Choice #2 - Truly let it go and put it in the past and create a loving and pressure free environment for him to come home to, thus increasing his desire to get back together
Or more simply....."Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy"
One thing I noticed in DBing is just how much "influence" we have over our relationships. Sure your H chose D, but you made the choices that made him feel like he had no choice.
The good news is that you seem tohave one of the wierdest D's I have ever seen.....a good amount of ML, a lot of contact, you are still introduced as his W. The ink is dry on the old chapter, but a new one can be written.
One of the members here has a quote in their signature from Mother Teresa "If we really want to love, We must learn how to forgive"
You will feel a lot better once you truly forgive him as well....it will be a huge boost to your self confidence.
(((((((Jen)))))))
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
I love my feet. I have cute feet. I had a friend once who had a foot fetish, and just liked to look at my feet.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
Truly let it go and put it in the past and create a loving and pressure free environment for him to come home to, thus increasing his desire to get back together
.
You and Ali are totally right I need to let this go. I've been given excellent advice from everyone and now I need to pay attention and do the work.
I want to be M and happy but I also want him to be happy. I hope he can be happy M to me again.
Last edited by JenInVen; 08/12/0803:59 PM.
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
It was funny. I would paint my toes once a week, well I still do, and he would ask me what color I painted them. On occasion, he would request I paint them red. Lol, he was hysterical...
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I read the site based on Jung's shadow self and it was fascinating. I have my birthchart and something that's striking is that my 7th house of Relationships is empty (so is my first house of Self). From what I understand Aquarius is rising in my 7th.
Jen *The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present*
