OW is PG

[Livin4ME]

So it's been 2 weeks since H came home. And just like all the other times, the feelings of if I wanna continue this are there. It always happens about a week to 2 weeks after he comes home. Usually I would bring these up to him. But this time I'm not. But it's extremely hard. I want to talk to him about how I feel, but I don't think it's a good idea. He's still here. So I should be thankful for that. But the late night and early morning texts have started again. I believe that they're talking again.
He told me last week that she has received a job offer in another state. It's been her dream to live and work there. And if she accepts the offer she will terminate. He informed me yesterday that the termination will be in 3 weeks. That really makes me wonder. Why 3 weeks away? I believe because she thinks that will give him time to change his mind about them. He says she is definitely gonna do it. And he feels that he needs to be there when it's done. I told him I agreed with that. Mostly for confirmation that it's done, but I didn't tell him that part.
The longest he has stayed home was 2 or 3 weeks. With affection between us stopping a week before that. Then he goes back to her. He still kinda cuddles at night but last night he slept with his back to me. I made a comment about it and he turned around and cuddled the rest of the night. I even woke up at one point and he was holding my hand. Which is something he hasn't done since before he left the first time a year ago. But then during the day, it's back to normal...not a whole lot of affection, which I understand.
Also, he's having surgery a couple days before the termination. It was scheduled after she scheduled her appt. Because of the surgery, I don't know how he is going to be able to be with her during her appt. Unless she changes the appt.
I guess this is just a huge vent post. But if anyone has some encouragement, I would appreciate it.
I don't trust him. That's obvious. And I'm thrown back and forth between this is a hump and if I really wanna do this.