Yes I think in the back of her mind that she knows I cheated. Why did I lower myself and do that (the A) to her rather than work on this back then?
The point is, we never worked through that in MC. By not working through the A when we reconciled, it was just this big ugly wound with a big band-aid on it, festering. It was never going to heal that way. Then today I opened the wound again and it will take the MC digging around in there to clean it out. It was inevitable, we had to do this or keep going on in a broken marital state like we've been in for the last 4 years.
I just pray that she will take this seriously this time and realize that we have to do this to make things right between us again. I do love her, she has to see this as an act of love for her, I keep telling her this is for us and also our daughter.
