i agree with JWS...stick to the high road...you are on a good track with your H. just think of today and tomorrow...sometimes it is so hard to stop ourselves from thinking in the "future" but that can take us of course and cause pain...
you really are doing great...baby steps!
Pisces M 31 H 32 M 7 yrs S 5/10 Beginning Contact! Vibes Hot Tub Cheese