Hi JCJ, we appear to be in the same boat. You are definantly not alone. I completly understand about having trouble talking to friends about it too because then I get the whole "He's an a--hole, move on with your life, forget about him" but I too actually want my marriage to work out in the end.
Then trying to make sure you fill in the weekends and trying not to make the first contact with a text message. The nights are especially hard thinking about him and going to bed alone.
All we can do is be strong and do everything to try to make ourselves better people.
Loneliness just sucks!!! And I completely know what you mean about the couples’s connections because I can surround myself with a million people and it does not matter that is not the connection that is missing. That part of your life is on hold right now but it is not because of you. You have become a much better person; just remember that no matter what there will come a day I promise, when you have that again. I can't promise it will be with him but I can promise for you this feeling will not last for ever. Take strength in that and keep on pressing. You are doing great!!
Me 27, W26 T-12 M-4 SEP 4/29/08 Holding 250 miles Awaiting Support Current
Well my h did text me back last night about the prom I told him about which was good. He actually texted me before my last post and it didn't particularly lift my mood. I think that is actually quite good as I am now not so reliant on him to make me feel good and I have stopped blaming him for making me feel bad so therefore I am freer to send these throw-away, no expectation texts. His reply was nice, it said
"Oh cool thanks. I'll get it on iplayer! I keep meaning to go to a prom but I haven't got round to it yet!"
I just replied saying
"The first Gershwin is really fun. I haven't got around to going either although I keep meaning to! There is some good stuff this year."
I would really like to ask him to go to a prom, but feel that as this is where we met and we would see lots of people we would know that it might be pressure. Although we engineer it that we could avoid seeing people we know. However, as his reluctance to see me is so much he might see it as pressure and it might be too much. However, it would mean there is no financial/ practical stuff to talk about so it actually might be less pressured. I would mean it in the spirit of friends, no more but I don't know how he would take it. I don't want to exacerbate guilt in anyway, although he doesn't seem to feel uncomfortable about talking about the proms. I might be ass-u-ming that he feels uncomfortable... or I could just be waffling a lot like I am now.
What do you reckon? Shall I chuck another grenade over the wall or is it too soon?
Well my h did text me back last night about the prom I told him about which was good. He actually texted me before my last post and it didn't particularly lift my mood. I think that is actually quite good as I am now not so reliant on him to make me feel good and I have stopped blaming him for making me feel bad so therefore I am freer to send these throw-away, no expectation texts
A very good place to be....now you can be you
TwinDad Me 39, W 36, M 11 W - MLC, WAW???? 2 Kids B/G 3 YRS Old Start of the Long and Bumpy Road..... On the verge of piecing.....a new beginning
You give sound advice I think! I just find patience sooo hard.
Sorry, not dumb at all, I forgot to say what they are! The Proms are a classical music festival that happens every year in the summer at the Royal Albert Hall. There is some amazing music and musicians. H and I used to be stewards there in our uni holidays. It is how we met :-)
