Is there a glimmer of hope for I'mstillhopeful ?

[I'mstillhopeful]

I haven't posted on my situation in a while although I do read the boards every day. There isn't much to report. My DB coach feels that H and I are friendly but not in the friendship stage. I have been busy GLA and maintaining the house and property. When I let H know that I was planning to take one of the trips on my own and had cancelled the other he seemed to relax a bit. His e-mails have become a little less business-like.

Last week in an e-mail he mentioned that "transitions were strenuous" and that sometimes he is lonely but that is "the price he must pay for deciding to be on his own". Sometimes he ends an e-mail with some kind of expression of caring such as "Have a wonderful day" or, "Be safe today".

A week ago we received notice for the wedding of his favorite nephew. Obviously, I am not going, however, his youngest sister just e-mailed me and asked for my assistance in making her travel plans to the wedding. She mentioned that it was her understanding that ESIL would be travelling with H and I to the wedding. (I consider the ESIL to be the second OW in this situation. My DB coach has observed that ESIL and H have an emotionally incestuous relationship.) Obviously, H had not yet told his entire family about our change in living situations. Who knows how he RSVP'ed!

The day H was to work at our local Health Center there had been a fatal shooting on the Main Street of our town. To give you an idea of the size of our town, the Main Street has about 16 houses. I text messaged him that morning as soon as I heard the news. It was a domestic dispute and the chances were good that he might have seen one of those involved in therapy.
He seemed to appreciate receiving the information before coming to town. He also mentioned a few days later that he had enjoyed receiving tms from me.

A recent e-mail mentioned that he wanted to have dinner so we could discuss some things, he mentioned one of the huge unfinished projects on the house, and, also, the taxes. He filed an extension in April and hasn't mentioned the looming deadline until now. Of course, I am worried that another loose end which he might be trying to tie up is something related to the dissolution of our marriage or division of assets. Needless to say, I am not anticipating our next meeting with unbridled enthusiasm.

On Wednesday, I will remove the ring which he placed on my finger 25 years ago. I have worn it continuously since then, through so many good times and bad times. My coach has convinced me that this is not the time for sentimentality. When H next sees me he will see that I am no longer stubbornly holding on to the marriage. He doesn't know that I am working to make it possible for us to have a better one at some time in the future.

I just checked my e-mail. Today is Sunday and H is at work at 6:20 a.m. Perhaps he was using the gym, however, he was sorting through his E-mail. He re-read an e-mail I sent on July 7 and
thanked me for the information I had sent. He finished his message by "Hope you are doing well. "