Dan,... I'm over reading your thread... \:\)

Lisa,... thanks for that, I'll read there too... I agree in the boundaries thing. Had I went on H the time at the movies he was rude and distant... I may as well have tried to spit on a 10 alarm fire. Would have got me no where. Hell, he doesn't even remember discussing the separation agreement during my birthday dinner *laugh*... I knew that it would be wasted breath in the long run.

Going "dark"... has really reset a few things that needed resetting. Probably more for me, than I even realize at this moment. I just posted to Ali's thread about something I was thinking about that maybe might help give perspective to how I ended up at the that push back state and what happened next. Giving up the struggle, not the hope. Ya know?

I sense in some ways we find ourselves reading other folks sitchs and think ... Hey... that's where I was 5 or so weeks ago... I know reading yours... I think... you're where I want to try to get to next etc... When this thread gets locked, I'm headed to MLC too. \:\)

A lot has happened behind the scenes by way of "reports" etc from folks who see him more than I, plus things he's said and done himself in the last couple of weeks that gives me hope... long haul hope... but hope just the same. Something *specifically* the H said about some of the "losers" and who they associate with in the neighbourhood... in conjunction with his recent "old H" social activities, has me really hopeful that he's walking head on to seeing the light about the parasite and how she fits into that whole gang of losers. *smile*

Never the less.. Right now, I need to keep working on me... I KNOW there's some relationship books I need to get back to reading but right now the prospect of it (even a book/dvd/cd set) that cost me 400 bucks is just completely NOT on my calendar at the moment. Emotionally I can't afford to expend that energy. It'll send me backwards. Did you feel like that?

I read these damn things and then want to get all gungho about the ideas and burn my little self out ;\) Need to pace and focus and do short sprints, things that last between 5 to 20 or 30 minutes at a time.

*hugs*
Abbey

T:22, M:20
H:55 Me:45
H-OW PA: N/07
OW Jan08
Bomb:Feb/08
S: Apr/08
Back together Ap1/09-Sept/11
Oct, 2011, uncertain future/H is a mess.
Dec/11 - Doin'friend mode. Some days are better than others.