Goldey, and Matilda, I feel good about how I handled the situation. I deserved to be angry with the comments she made at the dance venue. She's not accepting responsibility for them, but she at least heard my viewpoiont.
I do think she's right about the dance. If I choose to accept a dance with her, than I should be present for it. I felt trapped, as turning down a dance is not an option either.
We'll need to communicate what the expectations are if we're going out to a venue alone. She likes to dance nearly every dance, and I like a break. She wants the spotlight, and I don't feel ready for it. We'll need to communicate thru our differences, so that both needs can be met, to the extent they can.
She's mad at me now, and is threatening to not practice/dance with me for a period of time. I hope she doesn't hold onto her grudge for too long.
Don't worry. I'm not trying to mold myself into her image. I think though it's OK to experiment with some of the flashy stuff, to stretch myself. I hope we can get back on track soon.
I made a point of touching bodies while we slept last night. I think there are enough clues out there for me to move forward.
As was commented, resolving conflict is a two way street, and she has to communicate to me what she wants. There are consequences to her words and actions, whether she acknowledges it or not.
In my mind, I'm willing to accept responsibility for the poor dance, but not for the evening. I've said what I needed to, so won't keep harping on it.
I don't have control over her reaction, so will give her latitude to work it out on her own, at her own pace, but will be available to get back on track.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
