I am very sorry for your son's loss, losing a friend is like losing a spouse hard to let go hard to find a starting point in which to move forward from...
When one spends too much time inside of themselves, they become blinded by the doubt instead of seeing the gift...
Choices of direction can be difficult when we look at them as a road block instead of a path...
Don't forget that growth not only comes from love but also pain neither should be feared but embraced...
You have assets you have forgotten about don't run from them use them to your advantage that's why they are called assets...
If we fear failure then we have already failed, keep working those wings they will carry you to heights you never thought imagineable...