I found some yummy cheese!

[pisces9]

UPDATE!
right after i wrote the above email my H called to say Hi this morning...he was exhausted from 2 days of hard riding and said he just needed to stay home and relax...i said i can come over and just hang w you at your place for a bit - he said that would be nice...so i came to his house (brought him multi vitamins- he is out)...then we just talked about this and that and cuddled a bit on his couch...cozy! then i cooked him (really just boiled water) tortellini and sat w him while he ate before work. when we were talking on his couch he had a backpack out and i said id love to go camping- he said- well lets go...i said ok! (calmly) he said where...i said this and that - what do you think? so we are going somehwere TBD on monday!!! yippeeee~~!
so on my way out- he asked if i could help (i offered a bit earlier) to drop off his bike wheel at a shop...i said ok- no prob.
so i left and went about my day and took the wheel in- they had all these q's and i went to text H and he had already texted me to say thx for lunch...so we texted a bit about the wheel- then he called and i was shopping for some camping food...he sounded happy and calm...
i feel like we are almost a normal couple today. weird. its like things are the same- except for the major piece of living apart....i Iove it. i love being a wife. i love helping him out and buying things for US! it has been so long for me to have thought of 2 people..ive only shopped for one for months. this all feels so good. there is very little doubt in my mind. but of course it creeps in when i realize we are apart still.

clearly he misses me and wants to rebuild something w me. it is like being married but with the feeling of dating...very odd...BUT i like it!

its amazingly normal and i think we just needed time apart. part of me wants to analyze and figure out what needs to change but there arent many things and the major things i was worried about are fix-able and do-able in terms of every day life stuff....there are always things to work out.

i just am soo happy but still guarded. its like if he said the words i want to come home i wonder if i would feel different than i do now. i m sure i would be happy but not over the top crazy. is this detachment?

weird.....