he has talked about it a lot since the sep actually. so maybe my q is answered..he has said he needs to stop when i stop and limit his drinking..he has actually showed me by his actions that he means it..he even talked to me a few weks ago about not going with his work peeps to a b-ball game bc too much drinking...i guess i have to realize he will get blasted once in a while and thats ok- but i need to set things up for my safety- like take a cab home when he wants to stay out til 6 am, not ever argue when he drinks, etc.
It sounds like he's told you that he wants to change, but you don't trust that he will?
I would chime in that I think binge drinking is often self-medicating for something, I know it is for my H, and for me when I've done it. It's like, wow I ACTUALLY feel good, need to keep this feeling going by whatever means necessary!
I guess I would find it hard to be a cop, like your H, and NOT be depressed or at least dealing with severe stress. Does he have any other outlets for his stress--sorry, I can't remember if you mentioned that he works out or gets IC?
Could you participate with him in some stress-relieving activity that he would find fun/choose over drinking until 6am? I'm curious about your solution here, cause if H and I ever manage to piece, that will be an issue that we'll have to face, too. I can't get him to leave a party once he's gotten going, and before DB I never considered trying to offer him an incentive to leave...
It is in the shelter of each other that people live.--Irish proverb
