H is having affair after all - part 3

[Evie]

Hi Jen

I don't think your too far off the mark. I think he can see the outward changes, the weight loss, change of clothes, my new energy and confidence, change of rountine, always out etc. I've had flowers and chocolates bought for me, all very innocent, but obviously they're around the house and he has no idea who from and i think he's very curious.

Do you remember the comment he made about us living seperate lives and not wanting to know where i go or who with? Seemed to be an odd thing to write, why write it at all? Yes I think he's curious. His friend is even calling me sexy, so the changes must be visible.

The house goes on the market today. I think its the right move, but i'm not looking forward to the process inbetween. I'm stalling on getting my documents to the solicitor for her to sort out a financial deal, but I know I must gain control and do it soon.

H has been in the house for the last 3 weeks doing his decorating and having to hand over the boys etc. It has taken its toll on me emotionally. I feel quite uncomfortable around him, I can't quite do the small talk and I feel he's in MY space.

He treats every area as his home, even to the point where he tidied a magazine in bedroom and put it in my bedside table!! i'm so pissed at that and i can't bring myself to talk to him after i know he's gone through my perscription. I haven't said anything, I just don't want the texts/emails that i know will follow if i do.


In answer to your question about whether I would have him back, I would have to say that i'm not sure thats what I want right now. I really don't know how I feel about him, how bad is that?? How can you dislike someone who you once loved with all your heart and wanted to grow old with? I don't like the person I am when he's around, he doesn't even feel like a person i know well, he may as well be a tradesman. God that sounds awful and i'm waffling. This week has emotionally drained me
Not that he wants to come back, he's really pushed for this house sale.

Anyway, this week over with time to think about Rome!! I go on Sunday...yipee. I have no expectations from this holiday. I only want to chilax....

Happy Friday

xxxx