SG, what do you mean by "how does your wife experience you?" I can tell you that my goals are as follows:
a) Listen, not just receive what she says into my ear canals b) spend more time with her (3rd shift kills ya) c) more of a family man (both of our families); take part in activities d) no drugs ! e) make her feel the way she DESERVES, not how I THINK she might want to feel. f) more active religiously
2. Your relationship with your wife is over when YOU say it is over ----MarkF
on the contrary here are the negatives and/or positives of those
a) we don't talk b/c she doesn't want my opinion right now b) she's with OM c) already spending more time with her family and mine d) done e) can't do that by detaching or with OM present f) i'm active in our parish, now she hardly goes (might be guilt)
2. Your relationship with your wife is over when YOU say it is over ----MarkF
as far as what I THINK you mean by her experiencing me, she already sees I am more physically active, spiritually active, closer to our families, more involved in our son's life, sober, and her friends say I'm way more fun than the old me. not that this does any good, but she has said she is ecstatic about who i've become. it's just "too little, too late"
2. Your relationship with your wife is over when YOU say it is over ----MarkF
1) too little too late 2) she loves the OM 3) I need to move on 4) it wasn't meant to be 5) her mind is made up
I try telling her friend not to believe any of that b/c everyone here says to not believe what she says. friend and I are sure (maybe) she has doubts about all of this, but she wouldn't dare tell either of us that
2. Your relationship with your wife is over when YOU say it is over ----MarkF
1) i smoked weed all the time 2) was never home at night (work midnight to 8) 3) hated going to church, or spending time with her parents 4) overslept til late when she was home sitting, waiting for me to get up
2. Your relationship with your wife is over when YOU say it is over ----MarkF
Just my two cents, as SG is really more of the Goals Guru around here, but what jumps out at me immediately is that all of your goals surround your WIFE.
Sorry puppy I though SG meant my goals for the relationship. My goal for ME is to stop worrying about every little thing my wife does and says. I'd like to get to the point where I don't care outwardly that OM is around. I'd like to be able to say yeah if she comes back, cool, if not cool
2. Your relationship with your wife is over when YOU say it is over ----MarkF
