I'll sail this ship alone

[JCJ]

Oh how annoying!!!! I'm so annoyed with myself.

My phone bleeped through a text at 9.30 but because I was in a conversation with someone I ignored it and then forgot all about it. Then my h just sent me an email asking if I got the text I read the text and it asked if we could meet at 11.30 instead as he had been called into a meeting at 12.30.

I called him and said sorry I hadn't picked it up and I was still at my office. He said he'd see how long this meeting went on for and would give me a call/ text after that. I apologised way to much on the phone!! The thing is i could have made it as I have been doing nothing all morning but maybe this is a good thing so I can try and detach from the meeting. I'm just so annoyed with myself - more annoyed than I should be but maybe more because I had psyched myself up for it. Still, all is not lost for this afernoon maybe.

[mishka422]

Don't be so hard on yourself. You can't eternally be available to him. Not immediately jumping on the text is no big deal. Apologizing too much wasn't great but not the end of the world either. Let it go and meet up with him later.

[TwinDad]

Julia,

Be easier on yourself. Look at the good side of things. Your H sent you a text and then waited a bit and followed it up with an e-mail. He could have just left it at the text and never showed up at the meeting and said "I sent you a text". He actually made an effort to be courteous. You will do fine. Let us know how everything goes

[JCJ]

Thanks guys, the text was really nice and courteous and you are right about the fact he followed it up TD. You are right to Mishka in that not replying to the text is no big deal either.

I've just been for a long walk to clear my head a bit - my office can be really claustrophobic sometimes.

It's funny because I know that the him being polite and courteous with me is a step forward and it is so much better than before but sometimes we are so polite to each other now it is painful! I know, I know I'm never satisfied But he feels like a bit of a stranger to me at the moment. Him doing those courteous things though does say to me that I am becoming slightly more of a priority and at least he is considering me again.

[TwinDad]

More important than that.......he is starting to respect you again....you had to earn that....good job!

[JCJ]

Oh, you are right TwinDad, I couldn't see that but I can see it now Thank you

[pisces9]

TD hit the nail on the head! and you are going to do just fine
you are sweet and caring and amazing.
just be his GIRLFRIEND...its working!

[JCJ]

HI guys

Just a quick bit of advice I'm after. At the end of the last text I threw in 'Is it fun covering for (h's boss)' and he answered

'Yeah it is quite fun. Do you remember Nick, the head of dept? He's still being an a**h*le bit I'm trying my best to get on with him this time and it seems to be working for now! I hope you have a good weekend.'

THis is the first time he has given anything away really about his life. The first inconsequential text. I thought I'd reply

'Sounds like you're doing a great job. Hope you have a good weekend too.'

What do you think... it's new territory!

[pisces9]

i think replying with something fun is great...i think your reply is good...woould it be too much to add anot about seeing him?

when do you see him to have your talk?

[JCJ]

He said he was pretty busy the rest of the week but next week would be good. I said that was fine, just let me know when type thing. I thought I would try and take a step back from organising, if he doesn't contact me next week I'll rethink the strategy. I threw the bit about doing his bosses job on the end of that text. So I don't really know when we'll next meet, hopefully next week.