I was just thinking. The other day Puppy mentioned about how GBG was rejecting the marriage, not me personally.
Her taking an OM. Isn't that a rejection of me?
Just wondering?
Thinking about inviting GBG to dinner. Maybe tonight. This week sometime? Everyone. I have to go and check on girls today after work. Take them home, make dinner and invite her over, too?
I could possibly give her the info on Retro.
Thoughts?
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
I was just thinking. The other day Puppy mentioned about how GBG was rejecting the marriage, not me personally.
Her taking an OM. Isn't that a rejection of me?
Just wondering?
Sometimes. When there are LEGITIMATE grievances. Abuse. Neglect. Alcoholism. Generally when you've been a poor spouse.
But most of the stories on here are of good husbands and wives, whose spouses just really don't want to be MARRIED anymore, for a variety of reasons. And so they FLEE.
It usually has very little to do with you personally. Just look at the serial adulterers -- are those ALL their spouse's fault???
(((H4H))) Tom makes a great point. I think maybe its a rejection of us in regards to how "we" are in the relationship. Maybe not so much as a person, but the part we play in our 1/2 of the R...did that make any sense? LOL.
Give her the Retro stuff...
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
Went to visit the girls after work today again. My sister took them some lunch this afternoon.
I was just hanging out with them until GBG got to the apartment. She shows up. We say hi to each other. She is starting to tidy up. 'I'm going to go change.'
She comes out wearing an old, long clingy, black stretchy cotton sundress. I used to love that damn dress. Accentuates the girls very nicely. It became kind of an around the house dress. You cant wear it with a bra. Our last few swimming outings, I encouraged her to wear it, but she didn't. Has a stain on it now, I guess. She hasn't worn it since last year. NOW she's wearing it.
I'm sure it is just me thinking too much.
"Do ya'll want some chicken?" No one really replies. We are in the living room watching an old movie on video. She asks again, and again, no reply. I tell the girls I have to leave. D11 says, "Awwwww. Do you have to?" Kisses goodbye and hugs. I remind GBG that I'm going to pick them up to spend the night tomorrow and then eye doctor Thursday morning and then rushing to try to get the Raven tickets at Six Flags.
At home, S14 calls me. "Uhhh, hi dad. Mom said that I might want to spend the night tomorrow because you were taking the girls to the eye doctor? And me too."
I tell him that it wasn't the plan. That his dad was supposed to take him. His mom had emailed me. And a physical. She told me it was taken care of.
If I have to take S14 too, then we definatly won't get the Raven tickets. They are first come first served free tickets to season pass holders. "Oh, uhhhhh, well let talk to mom." "I'll call her and I'll call you back."
I call her. "Miguel said that I was taking him to the eye doctor?" "No, his dad is supposed to take him." "I just got off the phone with him and said that he just spoke to you and that I'm taking him to the doctor and the eye doctor?" "No, I'm all confused. His physical is tomorrow. At 2:00. I kept thinking all the appointments were the same day, but they're not." "Well, I thought that his dad was taking him to both. So I'M taking him now? If I have to then that messes up my plans to get the tickets to the concert. But if I HAVE to, I will." "I talked to him earlier today. I called to remind his dad. I didn't just get off the phone with him." "Well I'm confused." "I know. So am I. Let me call his dad." "Call me back." 15 minutes later.
"Okay, you don't have to worry about Miguel for tomorrow. His dad is taking him. I'm going to just cancel his eye doctor appointment. I don't know what he was trying to tell me. I know I was getting the dates mixed up. Then he was asking me about the insurance. I told him that he just had to pay a copay. Maybe $20 or $25. He said he didn't have it. I told him to just write a check and let bounce like he does everyone else."
"Thats true. Look, don't cancel the appointment. I will pick him up tomorrow night too. We'll all go to the appointments. I told D11 already that something might come up to where we might not get tickets. We'll pick her friend and go to the movies or something and Miguel can hang with us too. Okay? Don't cancel the appointment." Quiet. A sigh. "Okay." "Okay then, I'LL call Miguel and tell him. I'll see you tomorrow." "Okay, b.." I had hung up. I called S14 and explained the plan. Okay.
This sucks, but this is what she is choosing.
Okay, now no one has said anything about inviting her over for dinner. I thought that now that I'll have ALL of the kids at home, I can invite her over for dinner. If all goes well, I can give her the info on Retro then.
I think it might be the only way. Even though the kids will be here. Maybe I'll just ask to talk to her in the bedroom for a moment.
Thoughts?
Me 47, WW 38 SS18, D15, D10
Good Bye Girl. No longer SAYING she's moving out. GBG moved out 8-1-08
"I have now decided to enjoy life instead of figure it out."
(((H4H))) Tom makes a great point. I think maybe its a rejection of us in regards to how "we" are in the relationship. Maybe not so much as a person, but the part we play in our 1/2 of the R...did that make any sense? LOL.
I don't think you should have changed your plans because she and his Dad got all the times and dates messed up...HER PROBLEM. Quit picking up the pieces for her, that makes you an ENABLER. You are going to be fine just stop changes your plans around because she calls. GAL hon.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
