The boys soccer teams were assigned today. The coaches call me because I'm the one paying, shuffling both of them to different places, different teams (often on the same day), organizing, buying shoes, kleats, shin guards, etc, etc...I'm in charge; they live w/me...I've been pretty much single mom...and definately the only parent.
H has only, for the last 2 years only shown up to games.
I was not going to say anything, give him a schedule etc....just do it all myself...I do it all myself anyway.
BUT...I realize that is adding to me being that 'obstacle' between H and kids.
The coaches called tonight.
I tm'd H: 'S10 has a new coach...the team is the Bombers and they wear neon green shirts!...It's the team S10 wanted because his friend is on it:)
That was 1/2 hour ago...no reply, no acknowledgement...it's too soon...I mean 1/2 hours is only 30 minutes!!
Do I keep H informed of these things, even though he has not participated in anything but watching the games?
There is no way I have time to update and inform H of all the events in the 3 kid's lives!!
But, I don't want to be an obstacle and keep stuff from H, just because I feel taken for granted.
If H doesn't respond, or do anything to be involved (as in the last 2 years)...do I have to keep informing him?????
I get to feeling worn out.
But, I give my mom updates...my friends updates...so...I guess H should get updates. It conflicts with my 'no contact'?
I'm confused.
Sophie
~~ Me-50 H-38 Married 15 years 8/7/08 D8 S10 S13 H affair 11/04-7/04 maybe longer H moved out 4/06
7/30/08- present: Reconnecting w/kids,friendly 10/30/08 H signed D papers 11/10/08 D papers filed 11/13/08 D papers served at home
