God was missing for six days.. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day.
He inquired, 'Where have you been?'
God smiled deeply and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, 'Look, Michael. Look what I've made.'
Archangel Michael looked puzzled, and said, 'What is it?'
'It's a planet,' replied God, 'and I've put life on it.. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a place to test Balance.'
'Balance?' inquired Michael, 'I'm still confused.'
God explained, pointing to different parts of earth. 'For example, northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while southern Europe is going to be poor. Over here I've placed a continent of white people, and over there is a continent of black people. Balance in all things.'
God continued pointing to different countries. 'This one will be extremely hot, while this one will be very cold and covered in ice.'
The Archangel , impressed by God's work, then pointed to a land area and said, 'What's that one?'
'That's Washington State, one of the most glorious places on earth. There are beautiful mountains, rivers and streams, lakes, forests, hills, and plains. The people from Washington State are going to be handsome, modest, intelligent, and humorous, and they are going to travel the world. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking, high achieving, carriers of peace, and producers of software.'
Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but then asked, 'But what about balance, God? You said there would be balance.'
God smiled, 'There's another Washington. Wait till you see the idiots I put there.
guess i'm biased being from the state...lol
cire
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer. He tripped & fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him. At that instant the Atheist cried out, 'Oh my God!'
Time Stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. 'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer'?
The atheist looked directly into the light, 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask You to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps You could make the BEAR a Christian'?
'Very Well,' said the voice.
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head &spoke:
'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
Since we all know someone who rides a bike... Subject... I am a biker... I saw you, hug your purse closer to you in the grocery store line. But, you didn't see me, put an extra $10.00 in the collection outside the store as I walked in. I saw you; pull your child closer when we passed each other on the sidewalk. But, you didn't see me, playing Santa at the local mall. I saw you, change your mind about going into the restaurant. But, you didn't see me, attending a meeting to raise more money for the Hurricane relief. I saw you , roll up your window and shake your head when I rode by. But, you didn't see me, riding behind you when you flicked your cigarette butt out the car window.
I saw you, frown at me when I smiled at your children. But, you didn't see me, when I took time off from work to run toys to the homeless.
I saw you, stare at my long hair. But, you didn't see me, and my friends cut ten inches off for Locks of Love.
I saw you, roll your eyes at our leather jackets and gloves. But, you didn't see me, and my brothers donate our old ones to those that had none.
I saw you, look in fright at my tattoos. But, you didn't see me, cry as my children were born and have their name written over and in my heart.
I saw you, change lanes while rushing off to go somewhere. But, you didn't see me, going home to be with my family.
I saw you, complain about how loud and noisy our bikes can be. But, you didn't see me, when you were changing the CD and drifted into my lane.
I saw you, yelling at your kids in the car. But, you didn't see me, pat my child's hands, knowing he was safe behind me.
I saw you, reading the newspaper or map as you drove down the road. But, you didn't see me, squeeze my wife's leg when she told me to take the next turn.
I saw you, race down the road in the rain. But, you didn't see me, get soaked to the skin so my son could have the car to go on his date.
I saw you, run the yellow light just to save a few minutes of time. But, you didn't see me, trying to turn right.
I saw you, cut me off because you needed to be in the lane I was in. But, you didn't see me, leave the road.
I saw you, waiting impatiently for my friends to pass. But, you didn't see me I wasn't there. I saw you, go home to your family. But, you didn't see me.
Because, I died that day you cut me off.
I was just a biker. A person with friends and a family. But, you didn't see me.
Re-send this around in hopes that people will understand the biker community. If you don't re-send this, all I can say is that I hope you never loose someone that rides.
EVEN IF YOU DON'T LIKE US, RESPECT OUR RIGHTS TO RIDE WHAT WE CHOOSE AND TAKE AN FEW EXTRA SECONDS TO BE SURE WE'RE NOT IN 'YOUR' WAY LIVE TO RIDE . . . RIDE TO LIVE
It's Riding Season again, please be sure to look carefully!
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
..and I got my motorcycle license during my GAL...FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his.
Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, "Business trip or pleasure?"
She turned, smiled and said, "Business. I'm going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston .."
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked!,
"What's your business role at this convention?"
"Lecturer," she responded. "I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."
"Really?" he said. "And what kind of myths are there?"
"Well," she explained, "one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait.
Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best.
I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck."
Suddenly the woman became a little! uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry," she said, "I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don't even know your name."
"Tonto," the man said, "Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba."
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
A husband and wife are shopping in Costco when the man picks up a case of Budweiser Beer and sticks it into the shopping cart.'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife 'They're on sale today, only $10.00 for 24 cans', he says.'Put them back. We can't afford it,' says the wife and they continue on shopping....A few aisles later the woman picks up a $20.00 jar of face cream and sticks it into the shopping cart.'What do you think you're doing?' asks the man.'It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' she says.The man replies... 'SO DOES 24 CANS OF BUDWEISER BEER AND IT'S HALF THE PRICE' Services are at 2pm at St Gregorys Catholic ChurchIt will be a CLOSED casket.
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
Once upon a time, there was this girl who had four boyfriends. She loved the 4th boyfriend the most and adored him with rich robes and treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but the best. She also loved the 3rd boyfriend very much and was always showing him off to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would leave her for another. She also loved her 2nd boyfriend. He was her confidant and was always kind, considerate and patient with her... Whenever this girl faced a problem, she could confide in him, and he would help her get through the difficult times. The girls 1st boyfriend was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth and kingdom. However, she did not love the first boyfriend. Although he loved her deeply, she hardly took n otice of him. One day, the girl fell ill and she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life and wondered, I now have four boyfriends with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.' Thus, she asked the 4th boyfriend, I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?' 'No way!' replied the 4th boyfriend, and he walked away without another word. His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart. The sad girl then asked the 3rd boyfriend, 'I loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?' 'No!' replied the 3rd boyfriend. 'Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to marry someone else!' Her heart sank and turned cold. She then asked the 2nd boyfriend, 'I have always turned to you for help and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?' 'I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!' replied the 2nd boyfriend. 'At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave.' His answer struck her like a bolt of lightning, and the girl was Devastated. Then a voice called out: 'I'll go with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go' The girl looked up, and there was her 1st boyfriend. He was very skinny as he suffered from malnutrition and neglect. Greatly grieved, the girl said, 'I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance! In truth, you have 4 boyfriends in your lives: Your 4th boyfriend is your body. No matter how much time and effort you lavish in making it look good; it will leave you when you die. Your 3rd boyfriend is your possessions, status and wealth. When you die, it will all go to others. Your 2nd boyfriend is your family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave. And your 1st boyfriend is your Soul. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world. However, your Soul is the only thing that will follow you whereever you go. Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of you that will follow you to the throne of God and continue with you throughout Eternity. Thought for the day: Remember, when the world pushes you to your knees, you're in the perfect position to pray. Pass this on to those you care most about - I just did. Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections!
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
Are the skies more blue in Seattle or Spokane? FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
