"This man needs to be moved off of top dead center."

YES. This I agree with wholeheartedly. I don't want to sound as if lack of intimacy does not matter...of course it does.

but the fact is that he is home and at least SAYING ILY. I'm not sure what to think but this might be one for the DB Cs.

M: 16 years
Bomb 4/07
OW 20s long gone
Divorced 11/09
I remarried New Guy
Cooperative r w/X regarding D