I don't think he's nuts, and I don't think he's trying to hurt me. I think he knows that I am (and probably always was) the one he could talk to about just about anything. (Before the Sh$t hit the fan, of course) He really doesn't have anyone else he can talk to about this. He says he can't talk to his parents. His sis never talks about anyone but herself. He can't talk to OW about it because she's distanced herself emotionally and physically.
He needs a woman's perspective on it. And I'm safe. "What does she mean?" "What does she want?" Funny thing is, she seems to be telling him exactly what she wants, time, but he just can't give it to her. He has absolutly NO patience. Never has. Maybe he asked me because I know him better than anyone else does. Maybe he asked me because I'm a saint...ok, no, that's not it.
He's not pathetic about it. He really wants to figure it out. He has said that he gave up a lot to be able to be with this woman and he wants to know if it's going to work out or if he needs to move on...how did he put it, "We've invested a lot of time" and he doesn't want to think it was a waste.
I can listen to his situation and imagine it's any number of men here, although he's the one whose affair led to his divorce, now he's dealing with a walk-away (or at least potential waw) situation. He could easily be one of us. Sometimes I think we need to play all the parts to really learn about the situation. He may not have drawn the comparisons yet.
I'm not an expert, but I've been there. And I survived.
