my crazy mess part 5 the saga continues!

[christarn]

Ken~ Thanks for stopping by, manput/manswers...love it!! They are always welcome and appreciated hugs to you!!


Sandi...glad your computer is back in working order!! Nice to "see" you back in my neck of the woods!!! LOL!!

Work was hectic today, I had a shared load with an LPN. We had 12 patients at the start of the day...we should have only had 7 or 8...it was chaos to say the least. we managed to make our way threw...and nothing too crazy happend, thank God, for small favors!!

My work schedule is more chaotic now, because I choose it to be so. I use work as a distraction from my "crazy mess." Plus going from a dual income, down to just me...I had to adjust my wicked ways!! And learn, Coach purses weren't a necessity!!! BIG BUMMER!!! Now I buy knock off Coach purses at purse sales...not nearly as fun!! But more in my budget!!! hehehe...don't even ask about my shoe budget...God, how I miss shoes!!! Dang mortgage payment....oh well, I still have nice things...just had to learn moderation...a word I was not at all used to!!! Anyway....so hopefully(being positive here) when things move in a better direction, I can lay off of the work thing a bit. Go down to 3 12's and maybe a 4 hour shift....H works 5 day's a week anyway...so he's pretty busy thru the week.

I would deffinetly like some "manput" on how to ask for things without sounding naggy or mother henny. These were things that were brought up last summer when he and I were getting along better. He said one mother was enough. He didn't need me nagging all the time. I think/feel the meds have cut my anxiety down a ton...which helps, most of it was anxiety driven....nagging about small things....that didn't really matter at the end of the day.

FG~

I'm ready to go on with the plan...just am nervous I may be another "girl"...starting with a beginners mind here. The PIA chases him; I know this (i won't tell you how...but i know..fact). I am ok with chasing...but don't want to just be "another chick"...I know it is my personality and me that has to offset this. I get that...just don't want him messing with my head anymore...so i'm trying to get prepared....FG... need manput here. I completely understand that no plan is ever going to 100% be guaranteed to work...i still may end up going thru a big D...and that's ok too...i just want the best odds a girl can ask for!!

"I still think his anger is centered on your prior actions.. that means he is still thinking about you. That's good and bad."

Will you elaborate on this one please!! I get he is angry because I WA, he is angry because I filed...do you think it still has something to do with when we were dating?? Anger is an emotion that someone has hurt you, hurt=feelings, feelings are generally good...what's the bad...or should i ask?

thanks friends
hugs to all
christa