I hear you, about not truely letting him go. I did in my actions and to his face, but never in my heart. I tried, but I dont really think my heart ever did in the long run.
I guess now, that I need to find a way to forgive him better than what I have. He is still willing to work on us right now and I need to take the neccessary steps as to not push him away again. I think that if we keep having stupid arguements about my hurt and pain - it will soon be over. I need to not bring certain topics up any more (at least not to him) and find other ways of dealing with that pain - because he is certainly not going to try and ease it - instead he feels blamed and gets defensive.
How do I forgive, I thought I was. But then I realize when my emotions get going that I still take it out on him. TIPPER
